Happy Father's Day Honey!

Happy Father's Day to my wonderful patient sexy husband.  Every day he loves and guides his two kids, Tom and Yaz as they grow and become responsible adults. They are both parents now and I find it comforting that they have a perfect example to look up to.  This is Diego, the newest member of the Phillips family.  He's getting big fast and so far, Grandad is the only one who can put him to sleep every time.  He does something called the "Diego dance". I can't wait to see that one.  I also love to see Grandad playing with sweet Saffron.  She's old enough to miss him when she hasn't seen him in a while. 

As I've said before, not only is Vernon a great dad to his two kids, he has been the attentive, supportive loving dad that my daughter deserves and never got.  She loves him and wants him to be happy.  She knows that he will always be there for her no matter what.  

Happy Father's Day Honey, I wish I could be there to spend the day with you and all the kids.  Would be an amazing day! I love you.

Happy Father's Day!

I would like to say Happy Father's Day to three of the most important fathers in my life.

My English dad: "He is a very tall man". That was my first thought when I met him several years ago.

He is loved and highly respected by all in his family. He is often surrounded by his grandkids and as of April 2011 he is now a great grandad. He likes to play and have fun and I have never witnessed him grumpy or impatient.  He is a perfect example to his grandsons on how to have a good work ethic, how to treat the women in your life and simply how to be a good man. He is one of those dads who will come to your rescue if you are having car trouble or need a hand with moving and home repairs. He doesn't expect anything in return. When I am there I don't feel like a foreign visitor. I feel like part of the family, I feel loved and accepted and missed when I am gone. He is a wonderful man and I am thankful that he is a part of my life. I can see why Vernon is the man he is today.

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My Dad: He is my Superman

I don't even know where to begin. He's the guy who taught me how to play baseball and basketball and ride a bike. Most importantly he taught me that the only way to get the rebound was to "sacrifice my body!" He rescued me from my runaway tricycle as it was taking me down the hill way too fast. He picked me up after I went face first into a tree on a sledding hill. He took me trick-or-treating on the John Deere Tractor. He took me to lots of Brewer games, a Bucks game and I even got to see the Harlem Globetrotters. He taught me how to fish and how to do my taxes. He taught me how to balance a checkbook and look for a job. He coached me on interviews and helped me do my homework. He also made sure I had change when I went out so I could call home if I needed a safe ride, and I always knew I'd be much better off by calling him no matter what situation I was in.  He even didn't accuse me of lying when I wrecked the car on the way to my ACT's and I told him it was a hit and run while parked. He knew better... but never called me on it.  I have often felt like I have disappointed him because I did not follow the path he laid out for me. But then we have moments where I do feel that he is proud of me, and the woman and mother I have become. If it wasn't for the Christian upbringing and the work ethic, I don't think I would be very happy with who I have become or where I am in life.

My dad is also a wonderful grandpa. He has had to pick up a lot of slack left by Heidi's absent inattentive father. He has made sure Heidi had experiences and opportunities that I normally wouldn't have been able to give her.  Heidi and grandpa are best buddies, and that means more to me than anything he's ever done for me.
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My Sweetheart, Vernon, what a wonderful loving dad he is.

His number one priority has always been his kids. Making sure he made time for them and gave them the attention that they needed. If we were chatting, he would tell me one was needing attention and we would say goodbye. If I didn't see him online at all he was spending time with them. I love that about him.  We have had this long distance relationship because of the kids. All three of them. Although I have not been in England, I have watched his two kids grow up through pictures. He has told me of the awards and accomplishments of school, activities and sports. I hear about the friendships, girlfriends, illnesses, sad times and difficult times. I have cried with him and rejoiced with him and even given him advice on the tough stuff.  Most recently, I was able to share his joy of the birth of his granddaughter. He's going to be a super 'granddad'. Bottom line, he's a great dad, and grandpa who is dedicated, loving and loyal to the ones that depend on him so much.

He has also been a wonderful loving father figure to Heidi. As you know her dad is absent emotionally and financially and Vernon has been there to support her and encourage her and make her feel important and loved.

Vernon has dedicated his life to his kids and has made an impact on mine, showing them by example how to have a good work ethic, how to treat others and how to conduct yourself with class. He also made it very clear to them that they are loved. It's these traits that make him very attractive to me, well, it's part of the reason he's very attractive to me.

Happy Mother's Day

It's Mother's Day today!  I woke up my daughter at 8:30 this morning and told her I wanted to go out for breakfast.  I like the buffet at Country Kitchen and they always do something special for Mother's Day.  Of course, the teenager was very cranky with me for waking her up... but I reminded her that it was Mother's Day and that helped a little.  Well, by 10:30 my lovely girl and I were enjoying our brunch, she had a very nice hand made card for me and we had an awesome morning!  I'm lucky to have a girl like her.  She had prom last night and looked absolutely gorgeous, and yesterday morning we went on an early road trip to go shopping and we "car seat danced" and sang the entire way. After brunch we window shopped at the shopping center that passes for a mall in our area, then came home to relax and enjoy the rest of our day. I logged on to Facebook and I had a note there from Vernon's daughter wishing me a Happy Mother's Day.  She is a 13yr old beautiful girl who is very close to her dad.  I miss her very much. I want to teach and guide her as an adult female role model should, but it's so difficult with me being so far away.  Her laughter is contagious and her smile is amazing.  I love her very much and I fall in love with Vernon more and more when I see him with her and listen/read when he's gushing about her accomplishments.  Sometimes I have to help him with some of the female stuff, but overall, for a dad, he does ok.  He also has a son the same age as my daughter and for a while he's been going through a rough patch.  Vernon has been stressed and I have been as supportive as possible.  I've cried and worried because I should be with Vernon helping him out and supporting him, but, all of a sudden, his son is becoming the responsible young man that we knew he had the capabilities of being.  Vernon and I just have to keep loving him and supporting him while he finds himself as most teenagers need to do as they become adults.  I'll be sending mine off to college in the fall.  I'm scared and nervous about the entire transition. Sometimes I wonder if I will be able to handle the separation. To be honest, I wish Vern was here to help me with this overwhelming task but it's something I have to do on my own.

Back on the topic of Mother's Day, I love my mom. She is helping me get through so much lately with planning the graduation party and visiting me when I'm feeling overwhelmed.  She's always been loving and supportive and I have been so very lucky.  Another mom who means alot to me is my English mum.  She is simply the English version of my mom.  When I am around her I couldn't feel more loved or accepted as a guest, and as her son's partner.  I miss my family when I am visiting in England, but Vernon's family makes it so easy for me to not be as homesick.  Also, when I am here, I miss her very much.  I miss her hugs and the way she says my name.  I'm crying right now just thinking of her.  She loves her son so very much.  She does things for him just as my mom does things for me.  And... Our moms never ask for anything in return.  We are both so lucky to be blessed with the moms that we have.  And my mom loves Vernon. She's tearfull when he visits and it is time for him to leave.  I hope he feels as special here as I do there.

Happy Mother's Day to all the wonderful moms in my life.  You deserve to be celebrated.     

My first blog post

I'm not sure where to start. I wish I started this 10 years ago, but my access to the internet and computers has been a bit dodgy so what I think this will be are random thoughts and happenings pertaining to my relationship now, and random flashbacks and memories.

I feel very lucky to have Vernon in my life. He is my best friend. I am amazed that we found each other. One day in September of 1999 I decided to look for a support group for young single parents. I was a 28 yr old mother of a 7yr old. I didn't know what I was doing, felt lonely, had no friends and I had nothing in common with the other mothers who were relatively older than me. Being naive as well as very new to the internet I learned quickly that it was full of perverts, especially the chat rooms. I found single parent postings and discussion boards and read a few by some single moms, but they were all looking for men. I looked at the very few postings for single dads and yes... they were all looking for women. I don't want a date, I just want to talk to someone who knows and understands what I'm going through. I expanded my search to a single parenting site based in the UK. Same thing... the single moms were all hot to trot. I came across this interesting post by a single dad. He has a son my daughter's age and an even younger little girl. He was my age, professional, and didn't mention wanting to find a woman. I thought about emailing him, then figured if he turned into a perv I would just stop emailing. Well, he responded and we've been emailing ever since.

Our communication is mostly chat and email. We do write letters, send cards and gifts and several years ago we had monthly phone calls. The calls stopped because of money and because of his hearing condition which has gotten worse over the years. We have just recently resumed the phone calls because he's got hearing aids and a speaker phone now, and I finally have internet at home and subscribe to Vonage World which is GREAT! I try to call him every week, and when he has days off from work I can call him when I get up in the morning. The time difference is usually 6 hours, except for 2 weeks in the spring when it is only 5. I like that. Visits started in Spring of 2002. We tried for every year but as the kids got older and flights got more expensive, it just got too difficult. Vern has made it out here 3 times and I have made it there 3 times. So, over the last 10 years, we have actually been together, on the same continent, a total of 11 weeks. That's a little over 1 week per year. Wow! And I feel we communicate better than most married couples.

I plan on calling him tomorrow. I'll have to tell him about this blog.