We Have Been Featured on Real Size Bride!

RealSizeBride.com

Our relationship was noticed by a wedding dress website.  They are not just any wedding dress website, they specialize in plus size wedding dresses.  They wanted to celebrate love and the happiness of a Real Size Bride.  It was fun being noticed and working with them.  Take a look at their dresses, they are ABSOLUTELY GORGEOUS!

The blog post that was written was very nice.  My family and friends enjoyed reading it and I hope that my family of bloggers enjoy it too.  Help me thank them by sharing the blogpost and/or following their facebook page.

Their blog is full of interesting posts from plus size fashion, plus size modeling and planning weddings.  If you want to check out our article it's called "13 Year International Love Story! A Real Size Bride's LDR Advice."

My wedding planning has slowed down a bit due to the holidays but is starting to pick up again. I've posted new ideas on my Pinterest board and still on the search for more teapots.

MY ELEVEN YEAR RELATIONSHIP WITH TECHNOLOGY - UH - I MEAN VERNON (written as a guest post for another blog May 2, 2011)

Relationships change and evolve over time. Technology also changes and evolves. Sometimes they go hand in hand. Skype is eight years old. Myspace is eight years old. Facebook is seven years old. Twitter is five years old and iGoogle was launched five years ago as well. Eleven years ago, I met the man of my dreams, I had WebTV and I had no idea that we would be where we are today; in our relationship or in technology. If you are under twenty years old you probably have no idea what WebTV is. How would a couple maintain a long distance relationship without the technology listed above? Today’s kids probably don’t think about it and assume it’s been around since the dawn of time. We “old folks” know better, although I feel I’m speaking to a younger audience so I’ll tell you now…technology has come such a long way in the last eleven years.

Vernon in Michigan 2001. I’m such a Yooper!

Vernon and I met online. I was looking for young single parent support and he had made a post on a pen-pal site. I’m not sure how I found him because I was not familiar with this odd thing called “the internet” but he had everything I was looking for. He was a single parent, was my age, had a child same age as mine in addition to a younger child, and just wanted someone to write to, converse with, and interact with. Only negative was that he was a guy…. well, if he turned into a ‘perv’ I’d just stop writing him. We emailed each other for a while and discussed parenting, life, being single, working, and our pen-pal relationship turned into friendship which turned into something I don’t have a word for. Not a word that’s good enough anyway. We also wrote letters, you know, paper and pens and envelopes and stamps. Those kinds of letters. After several months, maybe close to a year, we finally exchanged pictures. Nope, no facebook yet, no picasa, we MAILED them to each other. I do believe that Vernon had a scanner and scanned a photo and emailed it to me. It took forever to download if I’m thinking of the right picture. We had already fallen for each other before exchanging photos. We got to know each other from the inside out. The photos were just a bonus.

As we got more familiar with the internet we became familiar with chat rooms. I don’t remember if it was yahoo or what, but we would have to log into the same chat room at the same time. I would create a private one so we didn’t have to be bothered by all the weirdo perverts out there looking for “cyber sex”.  I remember the first time some dude sent me a photo of his ‘junk’, that was pretty scary. It’s always a good idea not to talk to strangers, in person or on the internet. I then discovered an instant messenger program called ICQ. That was much better than chatrooms. So we used that and Yahoo IM.

We wanted to hear each other’s voice. I found a vending machine at the little shopping strip in my town and it sold international phone cards. I could buy one for $20 and we could talk for over 4 hours as long as we didn’t make multiple calls. Every time a call was made it would deduct some sort of fee that would lessen our minutes, so to get the most of our money we used it up in one shot. We did that about once a month. Sometimes I would fall asleep on the phone, or so he says.

There were no laptops, no wireless internet, and dial up internet was very expensive and the computers were very large and cumbersome. For a while I didn’t have a computer at all at home, just the webtv which had limited use. So when we did instant messenger it was while I was at work. Shhhhh.

Now with cloud computing (which is 100% of what my job consists of), digital photographs, Facebook, Picasa, iGoogle, Yahoo IM, Skype, webcams, I can go on, but you get the picture; our relationship has grown with the help of these tools. We are constantly aware of the other’s schedule, mood, and even when traveling we can keep in touch. We Skype once a week, only because of the 6 hour time difference and we both work full time jobs. Otherwise, we’d probably Skype every day. I have an awesome phone plan through Vonage where I can call him in the UK as often as I like and only pay one flat rate. I take advantage of that when he has days off of work and I call him when I get up at 6am. It’s a great way to start my day. I have uploaded web cam photos of myself and sent them to him a few minutes later. I record videos on my Flip Camera and he can watch them whenever he wants. He doesn’t feel like he’s missing out on major events and I can look at his photo albums any time I want. It makes the long distance relationship so much easier. Waiting several weeks for a letter is terrible. Don’t get me wrong, even with this technology, long distance relationships take a lot of work, but it just seems easier now.

Me in England 2011. We still look HOT!

Our bond was really strong from the beginning. I think that without this technology we’d still be together but the times in between visits and letters would be even more difficult and stressful. I don’t wish an LDR on anyone, but if you happen to be in one, take advantage of the technology out there, appreciate the time you have online, and make the best of it. Have fun and be creative.  I still manage to send Vernon postcards and the occasional letter or card. I guess I’m a bit old fashioned that way.

ONE MORE DAY

Vern will be here with his daughter tomorrow night.  I'm very excited and very stressed because I have so much to do yet.  I hate that I'm a procrastinator but I usually get done what I need to get done.  I did a countdown on my personal facebook page.  My friends and family that follow our relationship have been very excited for me which is really nice.  I posted a number photo or graphic that I pulled from Google Images every day.  I started on day 42 which is a number with a very important meaning to us.  It really feels like I just posted number 42 yesterday.  

I have an itinerary posted on TripIt so Vernon can see what I'm adding and provide feedback and input.  I live in a pretty cool place, although all I seem to do is complain about where I live in the winter time, which lasts from October to May.  But, between June and September, I really do like it up here.  We will do things that are very American and very north woods. We may even throw a bit of Yooper in there to make it even more fun.  Lots of family time is a must, which will include games, cooking, Wii, the beach (need to show these Brits that even though we are land locked, we still have beaches) and of course the free activities around town like concerts at the park.  I think we will have a great time. 

I apologize it has been so long since my last post. I will blame it on work and school.  I really enjoy blogging and reading and interacting with my fellow bloggers so I'm not really sure why I would put that off for so long. 

If you are in a Long Distance Relationship, when are you planning on seeing him/her again?  Otherwise, if you are one of the lucky ones who has ended the distance or never had distance between you in the first place, do you have vacation plans in the works? 

We will be taking lots of pics and video so there will be more for me to post after the visit. 

Seven Posts of Past

Thank you Sarah @ The Ex-Pat Bride for nominating me to participate in this. I don't usually go back to my old posts and it was fun and enlightening for me to read past posts. I can't believe I have had this blog for over a year and I'm amazed at how much I've learned. I value the friendships I have made and the camaraderie amongst other bloggers. Most of all it has helped keep Vernon and I close over the 3,500+ miles that we have to face every day. Vernon enjoys my posts, and so do my family and freinds. I also hope I have given encouragement and hope to others in long distance relationships. Well, enough babbling, on with the meme.
The rules of this meme are as follows:

To unite bloggers (from all sectors) in a joint endeavor to share lessons learned and create a bank of long but not forgotten blog posts that deserve to see the light of day again.

Rules:

1) Blogger is nominated to take part

2) Blogger publishes his/her 7 links on his/her blog - 1 link for each category.

- Your most beautiful post

-Your most popular post

-Your most controversial post

-Your most helpful post

-A post whose success surprised you

-A post you feel didn't get the attention it deserved

-The post that you are most proud of

3) Blogger nominates up to 5 more bloggers to take part.

4) These bloggers publish their 7 links and nominate another 5 more bloggers

5) And so it goes on!

6) The site Trip Base will be sharing the best posts from participating bloggers on their blog and everyday on Facebook and Twitter at #My7Links

1. Most Beautiful Post:  A Castle, Shopping and a Baby! 
During my most recent trip across the pond I got to see my first castle, go shopping with one of my dearest friends and a baby was born. I couldn't have asked for a better trip.

 2. Most Popular Post:  Happy Father's Day!
I was actually surprised at how well this one is doing. It is my most popular post and still going strong. I guess this is the day of the dad. I find Vernon's dedication to his children very endearing and very sexy. He's a wonderful father.

3. Most Controversial Post:  Are You Crazy?!?!?!
I don't really write about controversial topics, but this one was full of venting. I guess I can't expect everyone to understand or accept our relationship, but I don't like being made to feel like there is something wrong with it.

4. Most Helpful Post:  Dear Kimberly:
Someone from the Loving From a Distance site reached out to me asking advice about her long distance relationship. I replied and then turned it into a blog post. She and I are now friends and she is still in her LDR. It's a bit wordy, it's not a popular post, but if someone is looking for advice on LDR's this is the post to read.


5. A Post Whose Success Surprised Me: Monthly Milestones - June
This is another meme that I participate in and is sponsored by Sarah @ The Ex-Pat Bride. I'm surprised it has done so well because it is really short and basically consists of a to-do list for the month. Nothing exciting or earth shattering.

6. A Post That Didn't Get the Attention it Deserved: Three Very Special Children
Nobody likes to read about sick kids, but I was hoping this post would have done better than it did. Two of the three children have long journeys ahead of them and they come from such amazing families. The third had had his journey and has thankfully started kindergarten. I felt like I didn't do enough for these kids, like I didn't write the article well enough to catch the interest of readers or other bloggers. But then I thought if I got them at least one donation or caused a reader to donate their money or time to a charity of their choice, then I guess I succeeded.





7. The Post I am Most Proud of:  I Have Been Featured on "The Ex-Pat Bride"!
I was really excited when Sarah @ The Ex-Pat Bride contacted me asking if I would guest post on her blog. At first I was like, "why?" I don't have many readers, I'm not special. I don't even know what I'm doing half the time as I'm trying to post these blog entries. She is one of the sweetest people that I know and was really flattering and excited to see what I came up with. I decided to write about how technology has changed in the last 11+ years and how it has affected our long distance relationship. I figured Sarah's readers are pretty young and would find this article interesting. It was more of a structured researched article as I wanted to provide Sarah with a quality post. My posts are usually random and unorganized but I want my blog to be somewhat candid.

The bloggers that I am nominating are:

Sarah @ Crafting with Sarah
Christy @ Castles, Crumpets and Craig oh my!
Betsy @ Betsy Transatlantically
Yvonne @ Welcome to my World of Poetry
Brittany @ Tales From a Sailor's Soul Mate

Monthly Milestones - June

Well, I have 3 more followers this month, and my goal was 2. Pretty awesome! Not only that but I have found several new blogs and connected with several other bloggers. I have been enjoying reading the various expat blogs, mommy blogs, writing blogs and even a blog about blogging. I have added twitter and facebook buttons, and tabs including a daily photo. Vernon really likes that feature. It's fun for me too.

July I have a lot to do. I want to clean out the garage and start purging my belongings. Sell, charity or toss. It is important that I get rid of as much as I can. I also want to register for fall classes, I haven't done that yet. Well, it will probably only be one class because I can't afford to take two. I really wish I could take two.

I again hope to add two more followers. I've been meeting some really cool people out here.

Monthly Milestones - May

May has been a very difficult month for me; full of pain, drugs and feeling useless and bothersome. My being forced to sit for hours on end cooped up in the house has caused me to dive deeper in this thing they call blogging. It all started over a year ago with my friend Ali’s blog. If you check it out, you will see that she is a very creative and talented photographer who has three of the cutest kids you’ve ever seen. I would visit it every so often and thought this was a clever way to keep loved ones up to date on how everyone was doing. Then my amazing friend Kim introduced me to her blog. It’s just simply about happy thoughts, crafting and friendship. It was those two that gave me the inspiration to 1. Start writing again and 2. Create a blog! So, I went out and picked up Blogging For Dummies and began to think.

My blog was going to be a rant. Simply about stuff that pisses me off. I played with a few topics and then came to the conclusion that this world is already full of negativity. I should follow in the footsteps of Ali and Kim and write of positive happy things. Then it hit me… VERNON! It can be a simple blog about us, how we manage a long distance relationship (LDR) and advice for those in an LDR. I also post about our two cultures, travel, entertainment, pop culture and anything I can think of pertaining to our relationship. It started out kind of slow, I really didn’t know what I was doing. Now, for the month of May I have reached 18 followers and just this month I have written 6 posts. I’ve been trying to think of ways to make my blog better and visiting several new blogs a week, introducing myself and making comments. I’ve managed to pick up a few followers this month and it’s so exciting!

I have a basic goal for June. I hope to have at least two more followers and I will continue to follow new blogs and introduce myself and leave lots of comments. I also thought of a really cool idea to improve my blog that I know Vernon will love, but I’m not going to spoil the surprise right now. You all will see in good time.

Six Billion to One

Wow, he really loves me.

I got an email from Vernon today letting me know that he's trying blogging again.  I was thinking maybe it was about technology or just life in general, but I come to find that his post was all about me.

Then I was thinking, Oh how nice. He's blogging about how we met, the whole time line, our story, just the facts. Boy was I wrong.

I know he loves he. I've known this for many years. I don't doubt his love and I trust him completely, I always have. But reading his blog entry today felt as if he was telling me he loved me for the first time. I had butterflies in my stomach, my face got red and felt hot, and I cried. I will never be as romantic or eloquent as Vernon, and I sometimes wonder if I make him feel as special and loved as he makes me feel.

There are days when I think that I may wake up from this wonderful dream, because it just can't be possible to feel this kind of love for and from someone. If everyone had this kind of love, there would be no more war, no more crimes, no more hate.

Wow. He really really loves me.

Six Billion to One: Six Billion to One:

"So it comes down to Numbers.

Two People in a World of over Six Billion,

Two People 3710 Miles apart,

Ten years together and going strong....

...and one very lucky Guy!"

Language Barrier, Blogging and a List

Today we spoke on the phone. I was on the computer and Vern showed up on the IM so I told him I'd just call. We always have a good time on the phone. I love hearing his voice, that sexy southwestern British accent. Whew! Vern read my blog and liked it. I wasn't worried, he is supportive in anything that I do but since this involves him, I did ask if it was OK... and he approves.

I asked Vernon if he noticed that I used the word "dodgy" in my blog. He said "yes" and that he's very impressed. Funny. Why is it that his language is rubbing off on me? Yes, I do watch a lot of BBC and he sends me lots of DVD's but sometimes I don't get all the jokes. There was one joke that I heard over and over again, never understood it until lately, and I can't seem to remember it... Oh yes! In one episode of "Vicar of Dibley" the group is discussing the vandals of the town, and how they vandalized the sign at the "Tuck Shop". Well, it sounded like they said "tuck" but what the heck is a tuck? So I figured they said "Tack" as in horse stuff, but then I thought, "How do you turn 'tack' into a bad word?" So I just gave up on understanding the joke. Then one day Vern used the word "tuck" in a sentence. I asked him to repeat it, and then I was like, "There is that word! What does it mean?" And when Vern explained to me what a tuck shop was it all came together. I felt as if he answered the question of the universe... to which the answer is 42 but we can discuss that on another day. For you Americans who don't speak "English" a tuck shop is like a convenience store, a 7 Eleven, Kwik Trip, something of that sort. I just felt that "dodgy" was the only word I could think of. There are other words I use... I call my linen closet a cupboard. I keep linens, towels, and bathroom items in there, not cups... yet I call it a cupboard. Don't worry, my bedroom closets are still closets for now. Half the time I say "shop" instead of "store" and "film" instead of "movie". I asked him today why it's happening to me and not him... but he confessed... "I say 'sure' instead of 'of course'". I laughed!

As we were talking about our kids and the challenges we are facing right now with our 18 yr olds, he was checking out this Blogger site. He was quite intrigued (oh yeah, I say "quite" a lot more too) with this whole blog thing. He asked me how it works and I really didn't have many good answers for him because I'm new at this. I do want my blog noticed, but not by everyone that I know, just people that can relate to our situation and a few of my closest friends who I know wont think I'm being stupid by keeping a blog. I've always been a writer. I kept journals all my life, until the day I found pages missing from one of my books. It was my "now" ex-husband who went through my sock/underwear drawer for whatever reason and found it. Not sure what the hell he was looking for, but he couldn't read English so ripped out some pages and took it to someone to translate. What a dick. Well, that was the last entry I made. I tried keeping journals since, but it wasn't the same. Things are different now, technology has changed, and I need some sort of outlet since I don't get to talk to Vernon every day. I think he will feel closer to me with this blog, he will read things that we talked about, read about my memories of our times together and also read about things I wanted to tell him that day or that week and couldn't because one of us couldn't make it to the computer. He's all pumped about this blog of mine, and I am too even more now. He wants to start one, he's not sure on what topic, but he will have that to think about as he goes about his day at work tomorrow. I suggested he browse other blogs to get ideas if he needs to. I can't wait to see what he comes up with. Then we got to the topic of Google. I said to him "I Googled myself this morning" and his response was "That's a bit vain isn't it?" I couldn't stop laughing. Because of my job, I pop up. Then I guess he Googled himself while we were talking and he said, "I found my name, but it isn't me. That's OK though, I don't want to be all over the place." He's so cute.

He's got the day off on Tuesday and is all excited about it. Sounded like a kid who woke up to a snow day. He was naming things he wanted to do and then I suggested he write me a letter. "You mean on paper?" UGH! MEN! He's a computer guy but can't type worth crap. I love when he writes me letters. Then he said he was going to make a list of things he wanted to do on his day off. He names several things, then "take cardboard and bottles to recycling guys, write Kim a letter". I enjoy messing with him and got all upset, "I'm below 'take cardboard and bottles to recycling guys?!?!?!'" Of course, he said he wanted to clear everything off his list so he could dedicate all of his attention to me. Good answer. I rarely get one over on him... he's too smart for me. One of the reasons why I love that guy.

My first blog post

I'm not sure where to start. I wish I started this 10 years ago, but my access to the internet and computers has been a bit dodgy so what I think this will be are random thoughts and happenings pertaining to my relationship now, and random flashbacks and memories.

I feel very lucky to have Vernon in my life. He is my best friend. I am amazed that we found each other. One day in September of 1999 I decided to look for a support group for young single parents. I was a 28 yr old mother of a 7yr old. I didn't know what I was doing, felt lonely, had no friends and I had nothing in common with the other mothers who were relatively older than me. Being naive as well as very new to the internet I learned quickly that it was full of perverts, especially the chat rooms. I found single parent postings and discussion boards and read a few by some single moms, but they were all looking for men. I looked at the very few postings for single dads and yes... they were all looking for women. I don't want a date, I just want to talk to someone who knows and understands what I'm going through. I expanded my search to a single parenting site based in the UK. Same thing... the single moms were all hot to trot. I came across this interesting post by a single dad. He has a son my daughter's age and an even younger little girl. He was my age, professional, and didn't mention wanting to find a woman. I thought about emailing him, then figured if he turned into a perv I would just stop emailing. Well, he responded and we've been emailing ever since.

Our communication is mostly chat and email. We do write letters, send cards and gifts and several years ago we had monthly phone calls. The calls stopped because of money and because of his hearing condition which has gotten worse over the years. We have just recently resumed the phone calls because he's got hearing aids and a speaker phone now, and I finally have internet at home and subscribe to Vonage World which is GREAT! I try to call him every week, and when he has days off from work I can call him when I get up in the morning. The time difference is usually 6 hours, except for 2 weeks in the spring when it is only 5. I like that. Visits started in Spring of 2002. We tried for every year but as the kids got older and flights got more expensive, it just got too difficult. Vern has made it out here 3 times and I have made it there 3 times. So, over the last 10 years, we have actually been together, on the same continent, a total of 11 weeks. That's a little over 1 week per year. Wow! And I feel we communicate better than most married couples.

I plan on calling him tomorrow. I'll have to tell him about this blog.