I'm On My Way To The U.K.

I've got my plane ticket and new luggage and I'm getting ready to go live with my husband in England.  It has been a very long, expensive and difficult process but we are finally seeing a light at the end of the tunnel.

• I have been living with my parents and then friends for a total of a year and seven months, which hasn't been easy for any of us. 
• I have submitted my letter of resignation and presented my employer with a document and resources regarding UK taxes and being an independent contractor in the UK hoping that they will need my services after I move.
• I had to apply for my settlement visa, which was probably one of the most difficult things I've ever had to do. It took us months to get the proper paperwork together. For more details, see my post The Visa Application.
• I have been taking trips back and forth to my storage unit going through my things, throwing things away, giving boxes upon boxes to Goodwill. Today I had the ReStore pick up my furniture.  Months ago I even gave my truck to charity.

None of these things have been very easy for me to do but I manage to get this stuff done.  I plan on working from my UK home in the area of Salesforce consulting and administration.  I am very good at what I do and I absolutely love it! I'm hoping to find some work as a consultant or administrator when I get settled.  

My days in the US are numbered... here is what we have planned:

• Feb 1: Vernon arrives in Upper Michigan but very late in the evening.
• Feb 2: Vernon helps me move out of my friends' house.
• Feb 3: Early morning trip down to Madison, WI to spend time with my family
• Feb 10: Back to Upper Michigan to visit with friends and co-workers.
• Feb 12: Head across the UP and over the Mackinac bridge to spend time with my daughter in Kalamazoo, MI. 
• Feb 14: Visit more family in Detroit area.
• Feb 15: Non stop flight from Detroit to London. 

So there you have it. My schedule for my last few weeks here.  I'm worried I wont see everyone I want to see but I promise that I'll be back someday to visit.

There are a few things I haven't quite figured out yet. If you happen to have any advice, experience or input please let me know!

• Banking. I have yet to talk to my credit union about keeping me on as a member but we'll see what happens. I have to have an American account in order to receive payment from my American clients and take care of my ongoing American expenses.
• Mail. I've been looking at these mail scanning/forwarding companies and the security part makes me nervous.  One I've been looking at in particular is Mailbox Forwarding.  I really need to make a decision on this soon.
• Website. I need to create a website for my Independent Contractor status and I'm not even sure where to start.  I have a Google+ account and there is a way to add business information.  I need a new email address too. 

The worst part of this is leaving my daughter.  She's an adult in college and finishing up her last year but it has always been just the two of us.  Soon she will be venturing out on her own finding out who she wants to be, where she wants to live and what she wants to do.  This decision of whether to move or not has been a difficult one but Vernon has made it very clear to us that she will always be welcome to visit or stay any time she wants.  

My Facebook, Twitter and Linkedin links are located in the upper right under my profile photo if you are interested in keeping in touch or utilizing my Salesforce expertise.  

WISH ME LUCK! 

The Visa Application

This visa application process has many steps.  After I knew I had all the information I needed I had to log into the UK Visas and Immigration site and start the process there.  I had to create an account and submit my application electronically.  Vernon was online with me in a Google Hangout and we were screen sharing so he could help me with whatever information I needed, and it was a good thing he was there.  This application took us nearly 3 hours to complete. Not sure if that is the norm or if we did a lot of talking or what but we were online with this application for quite some time.  This is not something to rush through so if you are going to do this, make sure you have plenty of time set aside and access to your sponsor or family member for any questions.  You can save the application without processing it so if you need to save it unfinished you can do that too.  It's also good to save as you go. I made the mistake of not saving which I think is one of the reasons it took us so long to get this done.  We also had to pay for our application during this time.  In US dollars it cost us $1,513.  That amount will most likely change as the currency exchange fluctuates.

After I completed the online application I had to pick a location and date to get my biometrics done.  I chose Milwaukee because I planned on being in the area in a few weeks and it would give me time to get my supporting documents together.   It is very important to print and keep these three items: 1. Your completed application. You will need it for your biometrics appointment.  2. Your biometrics appointment letter. You can't get past security without it. 3. Proof of application payment.  I don't remember if they looked at it at my biometrics appointment but you will need to send it along with your application and supporting documents.  When it came time for my appointment I arrived at the U.S. Citizenship and Immigration Services office in Milwaukee. (USCIS) The security was the same as at an airport. I read that phones and beverages are not allowed so I just left it all in the car.  <<<Me parked with a view of the building I have to go to.  I got there early which was REALLY REALLY smart.  When I got there I had plenty of places to park, there was no one there except one family, but maybe 10 minutes after I arrived the people started pouring in.  I showed security my US Passport (photo ID) and my appointment letter and they x-rayed my purse and went through it.  After security I was asked to stand in front of another door and wait for someone to help me.  They looked at my letter, application and photo ID, wrote something on my application and told me to have a seat and wait until my number is called.  After a short wait, my number was called, I went into another room and a very friendly woman had me clean my hands with sanitizer. She took my photo, then had me stand in front of this glass plate where she wiped my fingertips and placed my fingers on the glass.  My fingerprints appeared before my eyes on the screen in front of me. It was very cool! No ink, no mess! Everyone from security to the fingerprint lab was very professional and friendly and kept people moving along. My appointment was for 11am, but I got there before 10:30 and I was out of there before 11.

  

Finally, I had to get my supporting documents together.  I didn't put in as much time before the appointment as I should have, and then took a road trip to see my daughter the weekend after my appointment which left me only with a few days to make my copies and put all my paperwork together.  I miscalculated how  much time I would actually need to do this.  I had access to a large table where I could spread out and worked every night for 3 nights until midnight, During this time I got really sick, landing me in bed over the weekend that I was supposed to finish putting this stuff together.  I finally got it finished 2 days later than I would have liked, but I was still within the 2 week deadline after my biometrics appointment.  Remember to be mindful of the deadlines.  The paperwork ended up being 11 pounds and I spent over $100 to have it overnighted.  I also included a box and shipping label for returning my originals.  It was hectic, stressful and very emotional when that package was taken from my sight but now it's just time to sit back and wait until I hear from the UK whether my visa application is accepted or not.  They say 8-12 weeks so we'll see how it goes.

The Passport

Well, in order to get the process of this Visa thing going I need a passport.  I had one, but I need to change it to my married name and it had just expired.  All I had to do was fill out the DS-82, (make sure you fit the criteria first to use this form). I got this off the Travel.State.Gov website.  Then I went to the post office and had them look over the form and take my picture.  That was fun because the lady taking my picture was pretty short, she was holding the camera over her head and had to re-do my photo about three times.  I also need two passport photos for my Visa application so I asked for extra copies and she was able to print those off too.  There is an extra fee for the passport photos.  It is not included in the passport fee.  Same government, different departments.  She cut the photo for me and stapled it to my application.  I then had to mail my application, attached photo, original Marriage Certificate (to show proof of name change), and my most recent passport with a check for $170.00 ($110.00/passport, $60.00 to expedite) and mail it all to the special expedited passports address on the application.  Super easy. Expensive, but super easy.  I'm now waiting for my passport to come back so I can continue with getting my Visa paperwork together.  Should take 2-3 weeks.  I am able to check the status if I want at the same website.

The Visa information states that I am not allowed to smile. It messes with the facial recognition software or something?  So I'm trying to keep a straight face.  The postal employee is trying to make me laugh and I did crack a smile but I'm mumbling, "I can't smile!" and he's doing this song and dance thing.  Lucky we got the picture because I was losing hope.

Because of the sudden moving situation I really haven't been focused on Visa paperwork, just the passport and getting packed and moved.  It's been stressful but I'm feeling better about the move, feel much happier in general, and really excited to be moving in with such a wonderful friend who is very accommodating and generous.

Have you or anyone you know gone through this process?  Any tips or advice for me or Vernon?  I'll take everything I can get.

I'm Moving to England!

Never again do I have to endure the extreme pain that this view causes me.  I am moving to England.  This has been something that we have  been talking about for a while and the wheels are finally set in motion.  I am amazed at how difficult and expensive this process is.

 The UK Border Agency has changed their website a few times since we started researching the Visa process and I'm really liking the brand new set up.  Much easier to navigate.  I'm not too fond of the income threshold requirement which was set in place in 2013. I was fearful that we would not meet that, but thankfully we do.  Well, I shouldn't say "we" because they don't care that I make well above the income threshold, they don't care that I am a self sufficient English speaking tax paying American, and they don't care that I have a job and an impressive résumé showing a variety of skills and experience.  They only care about Vernon's income.  We are lucky that he met the threshold so we at least know we wont be denied because of that.  The main areas they will be looking at are:  Finances, Proof of Relationship, Legal Marriage, and me not having a questionable/criminal background or a scary communicable disease.  This process is getting less intimidating the further we go because it's just paperwork isn't it? We don't have to make anything up, we don't have anything to hide, we just have to do what we love doing... telling people about our relationship.

I am a 43 year old mom and I have accumulated a lot of stuff over the years.  I have moved in with my parents and have thrown out, given away or sold most of my belongings, furniture, and household items. That was a very difficult thing for me to do.  I plan on hiring an international mover because I will be bringing along a few boxes and some select pieces of furniture that I am very attached to.  That process will be expensive also.

The MOST difficult part of this will be moving away from my daughter.  She is my world.  We have discussed it and she is not thrilled that I'm moving but she wants me to be happy and she loves Vernon like a dad.  She is attending school at Western Michigan University and her major is English, secondary education. In less than 2 years she will be a teacher somewhere on either coast of the US.  Maybe we can convince her to find a job in the UK? Ha ha, let's get me over there first.

So, not only is this the most stressful, difficult and expensive thing I have ever done in my life, I get offered a little challenge.  I was informed last week that Heidi and I will be homeless at the end of the month.  I cried for days.  Didn't eat much or sleep at all.  I hated everyone except Vernon and Heidi.  I even hated myself because I have finally failed to keep a roof over my kid's head.  In the past we've lived without enough food, months without hot water, managed to live years without a phone, TV, and internet as those items are luxury items, and have gone several days without heat in the brutal UP winters because nobody gives a shit if you are a single mother who can't afford to pay the heat bill, but she always had a roof over her head.  I had nightmares of us living in my car in the parking lot at work. What if people found out? Where would I shower? Nobody wants people in their house, they have stuff to do, family plans, no room, I don't blame them.  Asking the people that I asked was the most humiliating thing I've ever had to do, and they would have helped if they could, but it's not like I'm asking to borrow their lawn mower for the afternoon.  Also, during all of this, my dear husband landed himself in the hospital.  My life was falling apart and getting to the UK seemed impossible now and Vernon is so sick he's in the hospital.  I was afraid to tell him what was going on with me and I ended up doing the selfish thing and dumped my problems onto him.  The thing is, he's the only one I depend on, the only person I can really talk to. He should be, he's my husband. But I should have been a better wife and waited until he was better.  Now he's going to read this and scold me because he wants me to tell him everything that is going on with me, good and bad, because that is the amazing man that he is.  I just know it makes him feel helpless when he can't help me with such problems, just like I feel helpless with him being in the hospital without his wife by his side comforting him.  I will add that mum and dad have been absolutely AMAZING during this time and have taken a lot of the worry and guilt off of me for not being there. Well, Vernon seems to be better and should be getting out tomorrow and I have found a place to live.  A friend has a spare room for me and Heidi and she has already made us feel welcome and wanted; and we haven't even moved in yet.  I don't know if I will ever be able to thank her enough for this.

Another challenge that I faced this week was my boss.  I have been fearing this conversation for months.  How do I tell my boss, who has expanded my skill set, taught me new things, challenged me, and promoted me that I am moving to England?  Well, I did just that and his reaction was that he was happy for me, expecting this conversation sooner or later, and was ready with his answer.  He said I couldn't get away that easy and told me that I would be allowed to work remotely from England after I move.  How amazing is that? I'm going to get to keep my job. I love my job. Thank goodness it's in Salesforce.com and IT. Not everyone can do what I have the privilege of doing which is work from home.  That conversation was yesterday, and I think it finally kicked in today because I really haven't been able to enjoy my good news as I have been focused on Vernon and his health.  This weekend we will celebrate and I will give him all the awesome juicy details during our Google Hangout.

Well this is already ridiculously long but I have so much to say. I will keep you posted and try to document this process.  I've been getting help from a fellow blogger/friend who did the same move and has been very supportive, informative and helpful.  One day I hope to do the same for another soon to be expat.

Seven Posts of Past

Thank you Sarah @ The Ex-Pat Bride for nominating me to participate in this. I don't usually go back to my old posts and it was fun and enlightening for me to read past posts. I can't believe I have had this blog for over a year and I'm amazed at how much I've learned. I value the friendships I have made and the camaraderie amongst other bloggers. Most of all it has helped keep Vernon and I close over the 3,500+ miles that we have to face every day. Vernon enjoys my posts, and so do my family and freinds. I also hope I have given encouragement and hope to others in long distance relationships. Well, enough babbling, on with the meme.
The rules of this meme are as follows:

To unite bloggers (from all sectors) in a joint endeavor to share lessons learned and create a bank of long but not forgotten blog posts that deserve to see the light of day again.

Rules:

1) Blogger is nominated to take part

2) Blogger publishes his/her 7 links on his/her blog - 1 link for each category.

- Your most beautiful post

-Your most popular post

-Your most controversial post

-Your most helpful post

-A post whose success surprised you

-A post you feel didn't get the attention it deserved

-The post that you are most proud of

3) Blogger nominates up to 5 more bloggers to take part.

4) These bloggers publish their 7 links and nominate another 5 more bloggers

5) And so it goes on!

6) The site Trip Base will be sharing the best posts from participating bloggers on their blog and everyday on Facebook and Twitter at #My7Links

1. Most Beautiful Post:  A Castle, Shopping and a Baby! 
During my most recent trip across the pond I got to see my first castle, go shopping with one of my dearest friends and a baby was born. I couldn't have asked for a better trip.

 2. Most Popular Post:  Happy Father's Day!
I was actually surprised at how well this one is doing. It is my most popular post and still going strong. I guess this is the day of the dad. I find Vernon's dedication to his children very endearing and very sexy. He's a wonderful father.

3. Most Controversial Post:  Are You Crazy?!?!?!
I don't really write about controversial topics, but this one was full of venting. I guess I can't expect everyone to understand or accept our relationship, but I don't like being made to feel like there is something wrong with it.

4. Most Helpful Post:  Dear Kimberly:
Someone from the Loving From a Distance site reached out to me asking advice about her long distance relationship. I replied and then turned it into a blog post. She and I are now friends and she is still in her LDR. It's a bit wordy, it's not a popular post, but if someone is looking for advice on LDR's this is the post to read.


5. A Post Whose Success Surprised Me: Monthly Milestones - June
This is another meme that I participate in and is sponsored by Sarah @ The Ex-Pat Bride. I'm surprised it has done so well because it is really short and basically consists of a to-do list for the month. Nothing exciting or earth shattering.

6. A Post That Didn't Get the Attention it Deserved: Three Very Special Children
Nobody likes to read about sick kids, but I was hoping this post would have done better than it did. Two of the three children have long journeys ahead of them and they come from such amazing families. The third had had his journey and has thankfully started kindergarten. I felt like I didn't do enough for these kids, like I didn't write the article well enough to catch the interest of readers or other bloggers. But then I thought if I got them at least one donation or caused a reader to donate their money or time to a charity of their choice, then I guess I succeeded.





7. The Post I am Most Proud of:  I Have Been Featured on "The Ex-Pat Bride"!
I was really excited when Sarah @ The Ex-Pat Bride contacted me asking if I would guest post on her blog. At first I was like, "why?" I don't have many readers, I'm not special. I don't even know what I'm doing half the time as I'm trying to post these blog entries. She is one of the sweetest people that I know and was really flattering and excited to see what I came up with. I decided to write about how technology has changed in the last 11+ years and how it has affected our long distance relationship. I figured Sarah's readers are pretty young and would find this article interesting. It was more of a structured researched article as I wanted to provide Sarah with a quality post. My posts are usually random and unorganized but I want my blog to be somewhat candid.

The bloggers that I am nominating are:

Sarah @ Crafting with Sarah
Christy @ Castles, Crumpets and Craig oh my!
Betsy @ Betsy Transatlantically
Yvonne @ Welcome to my World of Poetry
Brittany @ Tales From a Sailor's Soul Mate

Monthly Milestones - June

Well, I have 3 more followers this month, and my goal was 2. Pretty awesome! Not only that but I have found several new blogs and connected with several other bloggers. I have been enjoying reading the various expat blogs, mommy blogs, writing blogs and even a blog about blogging. I have added twitter and facebook buttons, and tabs including a daily photo. Vernon really likes that feature. It's fun for me too.

July I have a lot to do. I want to clean out the garage and start purging my belongings. Sell, charity or toss. It is important that I get rid of as much as I can. I also want to register for fall classes, I haven't done that yet. Well, it will probably only be one class because I can't afford to take two. I really wish I could take two.

I again hope to add two more followers. I've been meeting some really cool people out here.

Romantic Proposal and Dream Honeymoon!

My good friend and fellow blogger is a finalist in a contest where she and her fiancée can win a fabulous honeymoon!  All it takes is to CLICK HERE TO VOTE FOR SARAH AND CHRIS! and then you hit the "LIKE" button under the video. I have watched this video over and over again and I tear up at the same spot every time! Help these two great people get their honeymoon.

They have been enduring a long distance relationship just like Vernon and I; and I only wish them the very best. Please take the two seconds to hit that like button.

THANKS! <3 <3 <3 <3


UPDATE:  They won and went on that fabulous honeymoon!